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Will it Stop?

 Hello to everyone!

The stimulus to write this blog came from a long lingering feeling which I have like a chronic hiccup in me. Especially since I joined my postgraduation. Being born in the family of intellectuals I had the fortune of inheriting a good set of genes, will to work till the end of time and a huge amount of discipline or a sense of it being present. I am three decades old and have seen a lot of stuff. Obviously, some of you who read this are much more experienced and might have faced more difficult and tough times than me. Still, I would like to share this feeling with you, my dear reader. 

Since the last 15 years, I have seen most of my loved ones leaving this earth one by one. I have seen financial crunch forcing me to live with a few hundred rupees for months together. I have gone through a bad phase of worse habits a person can think of. I have seen my fortune take a positive turn on putting a lot of effort. I have faced criticism, racism, bias on the basis of reservation and last but not the least on the basis of religion. The last ones especially in my postgraduation by my teachers, people who were supposed to teach me and make a good Microbiologist. Except a few of them, all of them tried their best to put me down by setting up a stage for me to fail at every step of my studies. Moving on, I would like to say that being exposed to so many varied situations I learnt a lot. I grew a lot mentally & physically (grey hair on my temples :). I would say that I matured a lot. Facing them was difficult but possible, again because of my family and friends. 

The reason why I mention all these situations and am writing about them is because of the feeling which I get which these incidents, situations bring out i.e. Will it Ever Stop? I have pondered over this fact more than I care to admit. I have thought about it not just when I am awake but when I am jogging, reading bacterial culture plates, giving seminars, watching movies in the theatre, having a drink or two with friends in pubs. I have given it a thought even in my dreams. There were times when it would make me mad, in the sense extremely anxious. I would have gastritis induced due to stress for days together. I would imagine different scenarios which I could have if my destiny takes an even worse turn. Never better. A human tendency I guess. The resultant of which were fights with my family members, rudeness and insensitivity to my friends. I went through all the phases of these three things time and again. 

Although this feeling was an abstract ache in my brain for a very long time still it helped me develop my thought process in a certain way. Until now I have come to four main conclusions. First being the obvious one i.e. happiness, successes, loss, partiality, betrayal, grief, love and presence or absence of materialistic things are a part and parcel of life. Neither are they permanent nor everlasting. Second, it is possible to live and enjoy life in a better and a fuller way just by treating each of these abstract emotions as phases of life instead of clinging on to them. Third, the only way to go through difficult and tough times is by sheer will-power & resilience, not just for tolerating them but also to channel all the negative energy in something constructive. Fourth is developing an ability to move on. To move on from the most peculiar of situations mentally and not allowing them to bother your mental peace. The best way to do it by talking to people you have confidence in. It should consist of a group of people - one who is smarter and wiser than you, one who might have faced the same situation and someone who would not judge you for whatever you say. 


In a nutshell, I might not have learnt the answer to the question from which we started in the beginning but might have adjusted to the fact that it i possible to live life in peace until I find an answer to it. 

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